


I'll still love you

by RegallyWickedThirteen



Series: Deckerstar [3]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:35:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24604030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RegallyWickedThirteen/pseuds/RegallyWickedThirteen
Summary: Lucifer has never really been a fan of birthdays not his at least, but maybe this year it will be different. (Set after Lucifer returns from Hell, because he’s going to return from Hell)
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Series: Deckerstar [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1514711
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49





	I'll still love you

**Author's Note:**

> I’m back writing Deckerstar after months, so I hope you all enjoy and do let me know what you think. Here’s to getting a s5 release date soon! 
> 
> Happy Birthday Lauren (@regaldeckerstar) I hope you have a lovely day. This time next year (almost) we’ll be celebrating with the cast at Lux 2! 
> 
> Now onto the fic!

DSDS

Lucifer loved a party, especially since finding himself in Los Angeles. Parties in LA were more than a celebration, they were another show, a chance to highlight just how rich you were. These places were dripping in sin. People ready to spill their secrets, as well as others who had wronged them in some way. 

Once Lux was established he prided himself on throwing some of the best parties in LA - the perfect mix of debauchery and elegance. LA - the city of angels, the city of contradictions was more accurate. People from all over the city, and country would come to experience a night that would fulfill all your deepest desires. 

So yes while Lucifer loved a party, he hated birthdays, he hated his birthday. He saw no reason to celebrate the day he’d been born. His family idea was a gift was to banish him down to Hell. To become the Devil, he was hardly going to wish for another better year. Time passes differently in Hell and he soon forgot what day or year it was, so his birthday became irrelevant. 

His first birthday in LA he had only known it was his birthday because he’d got a free coffee at the overpriced coffee shop around the corner from his penthouse. The server had looked at him crazy when he’d looked shocked, it’s LA maybe they’d thought he was stoned or something. 

He’d sipped his coffee looking out over the Pacific and knew he needed to do something with his life. It had been fun at first, walking up to people and getting them to confess their deepest sin, and punishing for it. The city had been fun, new, exciting. It wasn’t anymore - his life needed a purpose, he couldn’t float anymore. 

There’d been the odd brawl at Lux, alcohol fuels many things, including anger, but himself and Maze had always run a tight ship and people knew to take their business outside and away from the club, so the fact that Delilah had been shot right outside of Lux shook Lucifer and he had a burning desire to make sure whoever it was paid for their crime. The first few minutes were spent in shock, and then trying desperately to save her life, there’s a few moments, between life and death where the soul lives, after the body has died, it’s possible to bring someone back. For Delilah though it was too late. 

It wasn’t for the bastard that shot her, not quite - a moment to ask why, and to make sure they suffered for eternity. 

Seconds later the sound of sirens swept through the neighbourhood, Police everywhere. Someone would need to ask him questions - he nodded and went to wait inside. 

He didn’t expect the Detective to be quite so beautiful, or familiar, He found himself intrigued, wanting to know more. She, Detective Decker, was having none of it. All business and no play, Detective - I’m working and someone’s been murdered - have a little respect, and I’m asking the questions. 

Teasing and flirting (unsuccessfully) aside Lucifer found that he enjoyed the Detective’s company and also found that the work was somewhat rewarding. He could help bring people to justice and actually help. Maze thought it was a terrible idea - where was the fun in that when you could just hurt them, Lucifer laughed - you can take the demon out of hell - but the demon doesn’t leave not truly. He also knew that Maze was softer than she would ever let anyone realise and it would just take someone with the patience of a saint and a good sense of humour to ground her - someone like his therapist, Linda. She was more on board with the consultancy role, but still questioned his motives - was he doing it to help or because of this Detective, he was intrigued by. 

That marked the start of a rollercoaster of a relationship with the Detective, Chloe. He had to admit at first it was because of her undeniable beauty and his curiosity surrounding her- she was the only person not to succumb to his skill, not to spill her deepest desires. 

In fact Chloe was something of a closed book, guarded, and someone who found it very hard to trust others. 

Slowly but surely they grew closer, closer than either would dare to admit, though neither were as good at hiding their feelings as they thought. 

Ella, the eternal ray of sunshine had asked him once - why he didn’t just ask her on a date - he didn’t seem to have a problem with doing it with any other women. He’d smiled and teased her, but she had a point - Ella though infuriatingly optimistic at times often had a point. There were two reasons why he didn’t want to ask - one he was scared she would say no, the second she would say yes without knowing who he truly was - making her inevitable rejection when she found out even more devastating. 

He’d tried to tell her, tried to make her believe - but Chloe was someone who struggled with blind faith - who doesn’t and she needed proof, proof he couldn’t give. Not without ruining everything.   
He’d taken a leap after Chloe had let go at the high school, she would pretend she didn’t miss the drama and the dances, but she did, and everyone deserves a shot at a cheesy prom dance, and he was going to give it to her. 

It was worth it, to see her smile light up the room as they swayed to Only You. It was the first time he knew without a doubt that he loved her, that he didn’t want to lie to her, even if it meant she would walk away. 

That didn’t make it any less painful when she did, when his face, his true form had forced her to leave without saying goodbye. He’d been hurt and abandoned a lot in his life- but that had probably hurt the most. 

He didn’t think he would ever see her again, didn’t think he wanted to, it was a lie, and everyone in his life told him so. They tried to help, said all the right things, but it felt shallow, empty. 

Life is cruel, Lucifer knew that, Love hurts. Losing the one you love not once, but twice is a special kind of torture. 

He didn’t want to leave - he’d left Hell for good, and finally found his place on Earth, but life doesn’t work like that. 

Hell was as depressing and soul destroying as it had been when he’d made his great escape, but this time the order and the structure was gone. It was absolute chaos. At first he tried to regain control, and succeeded, a little bit at least, but after a while he lost interest. He needed to find some way to escape. Again. 

DSDS

Chloe loved Lucifer, she had done for a very long time, longer than she would ever admit.   
He had intrigued from the start, his easiness, his charming smile, his dedication (even if it was often misdirected). 

She’d been scared to fall for him, they were colleagues and she’d made that mistake before, no her and Dan wasn’t a mistake- it had given her Trixie- the centre of her world, but she wasn’t going to jump into another relationship with another colleague. 

Over time it became harder to resist him, he respected her and listened, really listened. He was there for her when she didn’t even know she needed him. He was holding back, hiding something though, what she couldn’t tell. 

He’d even organised her own personal prom, it was perfect and so thoughtful, and she knew that it would top any prom dance she would have got at high school. 

She wanted to be angry. She wanted to hate him. She couldn’t though. He’d told her more than once he was the Devil, and she’d brushed him off, because the Devil wasn’t real. Except it was. He was the Devil. 

She ran, ran and didn’t stop. 

She ignored everything he had ever done, He was the Devil - he couldn’t change, become better, she’d let lies consume her and now she’d lost him, forever this time. 

She spent days, weeks crying herself to sleep - re-living him making the ultimate sacrifice, re-living watching him go back to Hell, all because of her. 

She kept going, for Trixie and because Maze is scary when she has to be, they were all looking at ways of getting him back, reminding her he’d done it before and that he’d do it again. 

No one was convinced - not really. 

He did though, he came back, she’d barely recognised him at first, he was bloody and badly burned, deep lacerations on his back- a faint, weak Detective as he drifted back into consciousness was the thing that made her believe it was really him. 

The next few weeks were spent in Hospital - which Lucifer hated, he was fine - as fine as anyone could be after surviving and escaping hell. Again. 

The hospital discharged him - on the condition that he rested and sought out therapy - he’d been through a traumatic experience. He’d wanted to make a sarcastic comment, but stopped himself when he realised that would only delay his exit. 

Linda had tried to speak to him, and he’d tried to tell her, he knew that he needed to if he were to ever truly move on (look how far he’d come) but it was too painful and too raw and he feared it would be too much for her. 

Maze had tried too, and he’d said bits - she was no stranger to Hell after all, knew how it changed you, but she hadn’t been there, not this time, and this time it was him that was being tortured. The images inside his head. 

Chloe had given him space and time, he was still as charming as ever, but he’d changed, their was a look he got, often when he thought she wasn’t looking where he’d drift away to somewhere far away. 

There were nights where he would wake in cold sweats, shaking, terrified, only calming down after she held him in her arms, comforting him. 

She knew he sometimes felt like a burden, and everytime he told her that she reassured him that he wasn’t. He would never be a burden. 

She had debated about whether or not to throw a party, he had been back a few months and was slowly getting back to his ‘normal’ self and had even made a few trips back to the precinct - though she wasn’t sure if that was just to annoy Dan and distract Ella, but he was still a bit withdrawn, still got antsy with too many people - Maze was still running Lux for him - and he also wasn’t the biggest fan of surprises - but she knew him, like he knew her and she thought this would be what he needed. 

Lucifer arrived at Lux and was surprised to see it empty - Maze had sounded very insistent on the phone that she needed help, he took the elevator to the penthouse (he was staying at Chloe’s now - they’d not officially had the moving in conversation but it was more or less a given). The penthouse held too many memories and not all of them good. When the elevator opened he was greeted with “SURPRISE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY” 

He smiled and laughed, clearly he’d gone soft if he’d fallen for this, but it was a lovely gesture. 

Trixie hurtled towards him - “someone’s found the sweets” he chucked. 

“I had to taste test them duh” Trixie was growing up too fast, but he loved her, and it’s true - taste testing sweets is a must. 

“Hiii” Chloe said, and it amused him that even after all this time, after everything he could still make her blush. 

“Hi and thank you for this” 

“I know your birthday is complicated but you deserve to be happy, you deserve to celebrate. We make our own family and you’ve got a lot of people that love you” 

“As long as you love me, detective, I find I don’t care what anyone else thinks” 

“Prince Charming” 

“Darling I’m no prince, and you’re certainly no damsel in distress” 

Maze interrupted “You two can do this mushy stuff later, this is a party, so let’s PARTYYY” 

They both laughed but joined the party nonetheless. 

Ella was drunk, but insisting she wasn’t, bless her and kept telling Lucifer what a cool friend he was and how much she had missed him. Lucifer returned the many hugs and told her that she was a good friend too, meaning every word- he knew Ella had been there a lot for Chloe when he’d been gone, and he owed her a lot, right now though she needed water. 

Linda came to wish him a happy birthday and let him know how proud she was of him, he thanked her, she was like his sister and best friend and therapist all into one and he’d always be grateful for her never ending faith in him. 

Ammenadil looked awkward, Lucifer knew he still blamed himself, but the past was in the past they’d both made mistakes, terrible ones, and they needed to move on. They were both celestial outcasts now. 

Looking around the room he felt happy, truly happy for a long time, he had a family, he had friends, he didn’t believe in fairytales, but for the first time he believed that maybe he deserved happiness. 

Once the guests he had left he took a moment before heading off to find Chloe - she’d gone to get something- he found her, by the piano, she’d changed and was in a beautiful, emerald chiffon grecian dress, a sinful strip up the side, 

Dance with me. 

Always

The music drifted through the penthouse, and it was just them, alone in this place, remembering every moment they’d had together and all the moments that were yet to come. 

It still feels perfect  
When you ask me to dance  
When the colors fade  
From these picture frames  
When my hair turns gray  
The seasons all change  
And we've seen better days  
Whatever this life puts us through  
Baby, I'll still love you

**Author's Note:**

> The end- thank you for reading and please do let me know what you think either on here or on twitter @wicked_lisboa
> 
> I’ll still love you by Abby Anderson is the song in case anyone is wondering. 
> 
> Stay Safe and Well out there!


End file.
